The Ann Arbor News
Geoff Larcom
September 23, 2002

Common wisdom says that University of Michigan football fans are spoiled and apathetic, which is why they don't create the craziness of other Big Ten hangouts such as Wisconsin or Ohio State.

Here's a new explanation: They're out of shape and are not preparing properly.

And all those tailgate parties that stretch from the tip of Pioneer High School to the first hole at the University of Michigan Golf Course ? They're making you soft and weak, people.

That's my take after hearing suggestions from experts at the U-M's Vocal Health Center , who last week outlined some healthy hollering habits for football fans.

The first step toward producing a strong voice (translation: cheering like crazy) at a game is to be well-hydrated, says Dr. Norman Hogikyan, a surgeon and U-M professor of otolaryngology. This means drinking water, and not alcoholic beverages or those with caffeine such as colas or coffee, which are diuretics.

Why is this crucial? Because cheering also removes moisture, say Hogikyan and Marc Haxer, a senior speech and language pathologist who also works at the center. Notice how a mirror fogs up when you breathe on it? You can't replace that moisture with a Bloody Mary at a tailgate, buster.

There are other ways to prepare to cheer sans beer, says Leslie Guinn, a professor emeritus of music and a professional baritone who has collaborated with doctors in the rehabilitation of injured voices.

Before you get to the stadium, Guinn suggests warming up with some lip or tongue trills. Let your lips flutter as if you were blowing bubbles under water or making a motorboat sound, using a gentle voice. Once you get to your seat, Guinn recommends doing some slow glides up and down the scale with sounds such as mmmm, ooooo, or aaaaa, an activity that might intrigue those packed into the seats nearby.

During the game, Guinn recommends taking in a breath and using lots of airflow. Let a slight sensation of breath escape when you cheer.

Now that you've established some oral athleticism, Guinn urges you to be aware of your own voice and the effect of the surroundings. It's easy to lose track of how loudly you are talking amid background noise. Go by the feel of your voice, not the sound. And give your voice a break, he says. Save something for the fourth quarter.

After the game, Hogikyan and Haxer recommend soothing lozenges, but not those with eucalyptus, menthol, or peppermint, which can irritate vocal cords.

Think I'm kidding about all this? Ask Tom Firestone, a pastor at St. Mary's Student Parish in Ann Arbor who roots long and loud for U-M. After a game, he's struggled to preach at Sunday Mass, and sought assistance from Guinn. "It has helped lots," says Firestone, who now does exercises to strengthen his voice while driving. He goes up and down the scale, adjusting the inflection of his voice through breathing. And he makes those cool motorboat sounds, too: "Brrrbbbbbmmm, brrrbbbbbmmm."

Despite such preparation, Firestone struggled in the heat the first two games this season, and says he should have started hydrating the day before. "I had a little trouble, but I'm back at it now," he says.

The rest of you rookies have to wait until Oct. 12, when Penn State comes to town, to get in shape. Ladies and gentlemen, start your vocal engines.